Updates on my life.
I haven't been on blogger mainly because I have had personal trials that I would rate on a scale of 1-10 as an 8, with 1 being easy and 10 being Hell. I don't know if I want to write about these personal trials on a public platform. At least not yet. The trials are difficult to write about. Only a couple people really know about these trials. My husband, of course, has to live with me. He has been a huge support. I will write about my living hell later. Meanwhile, two things I want to share (these are not trials, please note.)
First I have written about "The Pain" on blogger before. It's called Trigeminal Neuralgia and I've suffered with this most of my adult life. I have been through periods of remission, thankfully. However, the condition is a real monster that I've had to cope with. My family has had to endure it and there are effects on my kids as they grew up with an afflicted mom. One reason I sell real estate is that I can often work from my home on my laptop and my phone. When I have to meet the public I can hide the pain and the condition for those hours with makeup and nice clothes. I can't hide always hide it during severe lengthy attacks. So, at times I've had to take taxi cabs to closings or have my husband drive me on my showings. I never tell clients or even friends I have this condition. The reason is people don't want a handicapped real estate agent. That's just fact. Second, I don't like it when people ask, "how are, how are you, how is your head?" I know they care but I don't want asked. It's chronic. I just want treated like a normal person and I don't want it brought up that I live with this condition.
However! True Story here: One day in November, 2014 my daughter Becca called me while I was in church. I listened to her voicemail and in an excited voice she said, "I have something exciting to tell you!" I stepped out of the service and called her. She said, "Mom, Rachel S is having lunch with Reinhard Bonnke right now in Palm Beach." I thought, WOW. That is so cool. She said, "Rachel sent me a text and photo she took of Reinhard at the table in the restaurant. She asked if I wanted him to pray for anything and I told her to ask for prayer for my mom's headaches." I was so touched that Becca would ask for prayer for me. Rachel S then video taped Reinhard praying and sent it to me. Reinhard prayed for me by name that I would never, ever have to suffer from these headaches again and then he blessed the food. In the video I can see he is there with a small table of 5 people. Becca believes Reinhard attends the same church as Rachel S parents when he is in Palm Beach. I was so amazed and honored.
Have I had "the Pain" since that prayer. Yes. HOWEVER, not as frequently at all. It used to rule my life and since then I've had long periods of being pain free. Also, attacks I've had lasted only a few hours. The longest attack was at New Years for two days. Attacks my whole life have always lasted 3-5 days with a recovery period of days. I know that I am healed, and I must continue to press into Jesus' finished work on the cross for the complete manifestation of my healing. I will be pain free permanently soon. I believe the myelien sheath that covers my trigeminal nerves is being restored and growing back. I believe that whatever caused the compression is being removed in my neck and jaw and brain.
I have another Praise God item to report:
I developed a growth on my eyelid right at the eye lashes. It was very noticeable and as my husband said, "unsightly." That was his nice way of saying "ugly" This was not a "stye" filled with puss. It looked more like a skin tag, but it was a growth sticking out and was an odd color, too. I tried to minimize it the best I could with makeup. I didn't fear that it was anything but a harmless, ugly growth. It grew and grew and there it was on my eyelid. I called my friend in the eyeball surgery business and asked what to do. She gave me a contact of an eye surgeon and plastic surgeon and told me that it's very real I'll lose my eyelashes permanently.
So I started to pray over my eyelid. I would set my mind on the cross, and the whipping post of Christ. I told the Lord that I know this is just vanity. Yet I wanted my eyelid restored.
One day I caught a Periscope broadcast of Daniel Kolenda and Reinhard Bonnke at the Atlanta Gospel Crusade. Someone was video taping on their phone with Periscope right from the front row. People were worshiping. I saw many people lost in worship and visibly experiencing the Holy Spirit's Presence and touch. It was very beautiful and I watched, worshiping along. Then the camera was on a woman in the front row in full worship. Arms outreached, singing, and really the beauty of the Holy Spirit was on her. She had a skin condition I had never seen before in my life. She was covered completely with large round bumps. Her face was completely disfigured from the bumps. My heart and soul reached out to her and I cried out to the Lord for her healing. I could see she had "accepted" her condition and her love for Christ was not going to change if she didn't receive healing. Honestly, she may not have been asking for healing. She looked so at peace. She looked like my age in her 50's. I prayed for her. I believed for her. My eyelid was absolutely nothing to her condition. I just really fell in love with this stranger on Periscope. There was a beauty about her even though she had this physical appearance. She inspired me.
I did a google search and I actually found an article about the woman and she lives in either Alabama or Georgia (I can't remember) The article was written by a UK paper. There is condition people are born with that is relatively rare where the skin creates these bubbles. Her story said she became reclusive in her 20's as the condition became so severe. She didn't leave her home for a couple decades. One day a neighbor invited her to church. She went. From there the Lord began to give her courage to go in public. She taught Sunday School to the children. I was so happy to hear that! I rejoiced and cried when I read she was a Sunday School teacher to children.
So I began to pray for all people with this condition and especially this stranger. I do not know if she has had any change. I don't know if a cure has been found yet. I will continue to pray for a cure!
Myself, I had decided to call the surgeon and make the appointment for my eye. It had been almost a year and this growth was still there. I looked in the mirror, put my finger on my eyelid and prayed again that my eye was healed. I thanked God that my eye was healed. I prayed for the woman in Georgia. Went to bed. In the morning my eyelid looked WORSE! What was that?! Yet suddenly I felt "faith" on my face. I actually felt "faith." It felt like invisible butterflies. My mind filled with light and I looked at that eyelid and right before my eyes the growth began to vanish. Had I imagined it? I continued to feel "faith" on my face for most of the day. I could feel my eyelid was restored to normal. My thoughts were filled with light and love. This faith stayed on my face most of the day.
Then I would have a little doubt. Then I would reach up to touch my eyelid and I was afraid to touch it, that if I felt something I would lose the faith I had. I looked in the mirror a few times to be sure I wasn't imagining it. The next day at the end of the day I finally asked my husband to look at my eye. He was astounded. He kept marveling that it was just "gone" That is amazing, he kept saying. My faith for the stranger has welled up in me. I don't want Daniel or Reinhard to get any credit. Or me. In fact, the faith we have is not our own. It is a gift. I want Jesus to completely get the credit for my eyelid being restored without surgery. It may seem small. It may see like a frivolous or vain miracle. It is still a miracle. The Lord was breaking through into my life to let me know He loves me. He cares even for unsightly growths. I now want to pray for everyone with skin conditions, whether it's acne or psoriasis, or growths like the woman in Georgia. I also feel like the Lord wants me to just rest in His love. Not do anything. Just really settle it that He loves me and He is not mean.