Sunday, April 3, 2011

A Baby in the Fish Tank

I had a dream that I had a "fetus" growing in a fish tank! I looked at it with a magnifying glass and could see it's little FEET facing me and it's little body and head and hands. I was so shocked I was pregnant and couldn't figure out how I got pregnant. It made no sense. The dream started out this way: I was pursuing this super cool career that was in a very competitive field, at a mountain resort. I was up against some very hip and smart youngsters who wore nerdy little glasses and were equipped with ivy league degrees and a California cool attitude. I had spent a lot of time on training, classes, working, buying hip clothes. In the dream I had miscarried a baby a few months back and I was actually happy at the time that I miscarried because I didn't want another baby, I wanted a career. After the miscarriage, while I was turning in reports at the office, a young lady competing for the job and standing next to me said, "your pregnancy is going to mess up your chances at this, " and I looked at her and said, "I don't know if I'm pregnant or not!" I was hoping I wasn't. I hurried back to my mountain resort apartment and looked in the bottom of the fish tank. I saw a blob down at the bottom and said, Oh that's just a blob of algae. Unsure of myself I pulled out a magnifying glass, the kind Sherlock Holmes uses, and took a good look. Oh, my! It was a baby afterall. There were those feet right there with toes and everything! I realized I must have gotten pregnant at the exact time I miscarried the last baby, which I thought was physically impossible. Yet, here I was pregnant again with the fetus growing in the bottom of my fish tank. ! It was going to mess up my career in the resort and everything I was learning and preparing for in my career. Now what?! I then woke up and thought, golly, that was weird. Maybe I was still asleep and dreaming though, because I thought to myself, "why on earth would I not want a child? why on earth would I choose a career over children? I really wished I hadn't miscarried that last baby and I wished I had a house full of children. My life would have been superior with a house full of children who grow up to be real human beings! What was so important about that career? Now here I am pregnant with a baby in the bottom of my fish tank! I should be elated! Then I did wake up for real. Later in the day I kept seeing those baby feet in my mind. I knew then that this dream was a dream from the Lord. He was trying to get a message through. But, what's the message? As I focused on those baby feet, this scripture came to my mind: Isaiah 52:7 How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, “Your God reigns!” I then realized that the feet represented the ministry of evangelism, Whoa! That baby is a ministry of the Gospel of Peace. Whoa, I was preparing for a career in a mountain resort, and I didn't want the responsibility that raising a baby takes. All the trials, the weariness, the hard and difficult work of caring for a little human being. The incredible responsibility of raising an upright standing citizen of the world. I was too lazy to even think about it. hmmmm. I feel like I'm standing in front of that fish tank right now, (which Jesus did say, he'd make me a fisher of men--the fish tank) "Now what?"" This is a very personal dream and I don't know where it will lead. It's a good thing pregnancies are nine months long!

4 comments:

  1. there's something really gross about the title "fish tank fetus." interesting dream!

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  2. should I change the title to fish tank baby?

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